Legacy, Control, and PROTEIN
- ET
- Apr 20
- 8 min read
Hey Grit Nation!
The following is part of the free newsletter from February. To stay up to date on the latest and greatest, make sure to subscribe!
💡 This Week’s Gritty Thought
Do I own my belongings, or do they own ME?
L.A. Fires. Lahaina before. Natural disasters of all kinds all over. In short time, everyTHING, except what you can grab is GONE. It is heavy to think about- devastating to see. I’ve been following Antonio Neves (@theantonioneves) : author, speaker, entertainment biz veteran, and thought leader for a while. He was gracious enough to join me on Blue Grit Radio after we connected (here).
Antonio created “Man Morning,” an effort for men to connect with their friends and brothers to support and sharpen each other. It is easily translatable to anyone.. Some college buddies and I set a monthly calendar event to do it.
(Aside- it’s not getting beers and talking sportsball and BS. It’s usually a coffee outing to talk challenges: work, balance, parenting, marriage. It’s intentional, peer support aligned and it’s fantastic).
Back to the point- Antonio and his family: wife and two girls lost their home and everything. I saw him sharing on his social. He put out messages about what one is to do, and answered his own question.
You move forward. Inspiring. They elected not to set up a Go Fund Me. Inspiring. They advertised their girls’ online LemonAID stand. Inspiring. (venmo gigiyogini if interested) I submitted a donation and bought a copy of Antonio’s book on Amazon. And I pondered.
What was grounding was that Antonio was conveying that he didn’t lose EVERYthing. When we think about what really matters, 99.9999999999% of the time we all say it’s FAMILY. Family, family, family. (Teaser to upcoming episode with fmr. Cop and Director of Stronger Families: Shawn Barnes!!) Family, yes that’s why we do all we do, how we do it. That’s good and all, but do we SHOW it? Do we live by it?
Sure, you may say. You work hard for your family. You work hard to provide them things. THINGS. But take it from me, growing up pretty middle class in a very affluent area after moving to the Seattle area, I had a LOT of friends with more. Although I did get enticed and interested in THINGS, I didn’t envy them for their stuff. I envied them for their dads.
Cut back to us. Me. Now. As much as I approach life frugally in some respects and the opposite in others, I like to think my stuff doesn’t own me. I like to think I have my priorities straight. But you know what else falls into the things/stuff column? Your career: titles, accolades, achievements. Validation. Dopamine. What else? Your body. I built a strong ability (and physique) in my late 20s and early 30s. I started from nothing as a teen and young adult. If I were to say I didn’t grow a level of vanity in the process, I would be bold-faced lying. Learning about health issues in the past few years: hormonal, spinal, etc. has proved devastating at times. I was working so hard.. Doing all the things.. And yet…
We are not our things. We are not our careers. We are not even our physical bodies. Yes, that one is hard. One day we won’t even be our minds, even if we age gracefully, our faculties will not remain stalwart and robust. So what are we?
We are our relationships. We are our connections. We are memories we create by virtue of everything we do and how we do it. We are how we leave people thinking and feeling. We are only our legacy. And that is why family is so foundational: it is the root of what we consider our Legacy.
Family takes all shapes and sizes. Regardless of your family, consider your family. Your tribe. The bonds that transcend clubs, hobbies, schooling, and vocation. Your people.
Live for them. Carve time. Carve intention. Set a date with your ol’ buddy even if it’s 3 weeks out. And KEEP it. Set the phone down when your little one is trying to ask you a darling question about why things in the world are the way they are. Don’t judge or shame yourself when you misstep. And make eye contact with your partner when they are saying something nice. And pause in embrace before rushing off to do that (not so) important thing. (Sounds specific? Yeah, this is me).
Give grace, most of all to yourself. It contributes to grit, which you are here to give yourself, too.
🗣 Quote of the Week
He who laughs at himself never runs out of things to laugh at.— Epictetus
Why so serious? I was asked this much of my life. Still am. I suppose as far back as I can remember, my shyness instilled a RBF (aka Resting Bro Face). At net-neutral, I look stern at best and like I’m trying to do mental math while sitting in rush hour traffic at worst.
Those that know me tell me I can be funny. Light-hearted. Goofy. And yet, it’s something I still contend with. In new, strange environments, I’m cautious. I’m not sure whether it’s a desire to protect or specifically to not look dumb, but perhaps it’s both for many of us who are a bit more reserved at first.
Regardless of how we default or choose to navigate the world and interactions with other folks in all types of environments and contexts, there is much POWER in not taking ourselves too seriously. It’s probably why one of my most popular IG posts is just me recounting a construction worker telling me how he didn’t like a lot of cops and how I agreed- that we aren’t often the most likeable bunch. He cackled a bit, turned and told me I was alright.
At the end of the day, we have a choice. We can choose whether our mistakes generate shame or some wisdom with a chuckle. We can choose whether we need to worry about what others think, or just pay ourselves the ultimate gift of self-acceptance and self-love.
Ultimately, it can be comforting to know that most of us are just trying to carry on through our lives, than to be worrying about the little things about people. Most of the time, we can choose to feel wary and anxious with a frown or Resting Bro or Broette Face, or a shake of our heads with a laugh, smile or at least half a grin.
🎙 New Podcast Episodes
As always please follow/subscribe, share the show and give a 5 star rating and review on Apple or Spotify!
*Sneak Peek (Kinda): First full-length video episode on YouTube, with returning guest and BBF (Best Bro Forever) Trevor Wolcott. The podcast audio will launch this upcoming week! If you hate podcasts but love video formats, let me know.. Perhaps I will post more!
🚀178: Small Town, Big City Police, & Countless Lessons w/ Sgt. Steve Gould (Things Police See Podcast)
✅ working big city to small town police work✅ the pervasive negativity in police culture✅ his journey of building a podcast empire!
🚀 179: Loss, Struggle, and Resilience for First Responders, Chris Littrell and John Kelly
✅ panel of 3 fmr. Police sgts, and current podcasting first responder wellness advocates!✅ the focal point is around Chris’ continued post traumatic growth journey and recent loss of his daughter✅ we talk about where to go when you’re at the bottom, starting with the smallest habits, going and growing from there
🚀 180: A.I. and Policing
✅ with Abel Police founder, Daniel Francis, how to get cops on the street more of their day✅ Pitfalls and opportunities of AI for report-writing
🚀 181: Most “Satisfying” Arrest, Criminal Justice System and Difficult Outcomes
✅ returning guests, coworkers Officers Sam Steiner and Tessa Melville✅ detailing how a great, “satisfying” arrest isn’t so simple to come up with and process
☀️Wellness 🍎
Nutrition and Protein
In college, like many young men, the fitness/supplement industry taught us the importance of (ma more) PROTEIN! Most of the stuff on the market was garbage, specifically the commercial, low quality, flashy branded stuff that riddled over half of every muscle mag or Men’s Fitness.
In more recent years, the importance of quality protein is not just recognized by muscle-bound gym rats, but athletes of all calibers. Beyond that, more functional health practitioners, holistic medicine docs, and longevity experts are touting the non-negotiable nature of adequate protein. It alone won’t make someone “bulky” (it takes a LOT of lifting, food, AND rest to get that), but aids lean muscle which supports bone density, health, and durability. Who doesn’t want to get hurt as we age?
Whether you aren’t a big eater, or you’re on the move, or you just don’t like eating that much meat, protein supplements can be great additions to your nutritional regimen. If you don’t like “meat”, consider eggs, greek yogurt, etc. If you don’t like eggs/dairy, consider beans, lentils.. But just realize it won’t move the needle if you’re trying to get to 100-200 g a day (depending on your body, activity, and goals).
That’s where protein powder comes in- getting you 20-30 g a serving in general.
For years, I’ve learned to READ labels, avoid fillers, excess chemical and the cruddy sweeteners like aspartame and sucralose. I’ve opted for options like monk fruit/erythritol/stevia if given the option.
Chasing the value/quality combo I’ve been using Nutricost products for years. I toggle on and off of grass-fed whey isolate (lower dairy) and organic vegan blends and Nutricost has both for about the best price per serving at higher quality levels.
To shop and pick your preferred protein, click HERE (with code BLUEGRIT already in the cart for your 10% discount).
📰 News & Offerings
I got to chat about my new Police Hiring and Testing Guide (avail here!) on the Police Applicant podcast! My sincere appreciation for Ken (retired LA background investigator and all-around good dude) for having me back on! In fact, my first podcast appearance was on his show where he chatted with me and Brian about police recruiting. In many ways, he gave me confidence to consider starting and growing my own show. His mentorship is so appreciated and continues to make such a difference, helping volumes of people navigate the hiring process- thus helping create a TON more awesome cops and safer communities! You can hear our chat here on Apple!
I am honored to have been a guest on the Vinny Roc podcast. Vinny “Rocco” Vargas is a veteran and LEO who is an avid supporter of mental health topics. He goes back with a coworker of mine from the Rangers. It’s always a nervous joy to join someone on their show, even after running my own for a couple years. He asks about Diego, which always hits me in the feels. I think often about how I probably wouldn’t be doing any of this push in first responder health, wellness, content and engagement if not for him and his legacy. Listening back hit me in the feels again! Miss you bro! Listen here on Apple.
🔥 Entry Level Online Group Coaching starting up Feb 12- reply back to reserve your spot! (Feb and March, twice a month in the evening. Q and A, direct feedback, tips and more! Recorded if you miss a session).
📌 Hiring Guide AND the Promotional Testing Guide (for Sgt, Command, etc.) are both LIVE! Everything you need to know for the processes, prep, and actually showing up your best for the job! bluegritwellness.com/SHOP
💪🏽💪🏽 Want a discount on the best value high-quality supplements? I've legitimately used Nutricost products easily for a decade. Whey isolate, plant proteins, collagen, vitamins, etc...??
Promo Code: BLUEGRIT - 10% off , Click HERE to access the instant discount and to browse staples like protein, collagen, creatine, vitamins and minerals like L-Theanine and Magnesium…
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As always, thanks for being part of this positive, driven community to do and be our best: for ourselves, our families, teams, and more. Share this newsletter and what’s helpful! Send your questions, feedback, and topic ideas!
Stay safe, stay hungry, and stay gritty!
Tung
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*Legal disclaimer, please do not consider anything in this newsletter as medical or legal advise from Eric Tung or Blue Grit. I’m just giving helpful tips, resources and insight. Consult your people and professionals and be your own advocate!
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